What Had Not Been
by ElizPerk
Summary: How would Christy's story have changed if she hadn't accepted Dr. Ferrand's initial offer and instead waited a year and a half to go to Cutter Gap. Would she still end up caught between the Preacher and the Doctor or would she have lost out on to much?
1. Author's Note

May 30, 2009

Author's Note:

I should have started with this originally, but at the time I was so caught up in the idea of starting a story that I didn't really think it through.

What Had Not Been follows the story of Christy if she had waited a year and a half to come to Cutter Gap. The story coincides with the book in that Margaret really has passed away, but other than that its as if I'm starting the book from the beginning. Bold I know, but I've always wondered what it would happen if…well I guess I shouldn't give it away. So sorry but I couldn't bring myself to butcher Neil's accent so please use your imagination, trust me its better this way.

Thank you a head of time for any reviews and feedback. It makes me feel more motivated when I hear what you are thinking. I started WHNB over a year ago and then got engaged so I'm afraid I was to busy living my own love story to finish Christy's. Now I am married, settled and ready to complete my story! Wish me luck!

Sincerely,

Elizabeth


	2. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I seek no profit from this story. The story of Christy and all characters that are associated with the book belong to the Marshall-LeSourd family.

Summary: What if Christy had refused Dr. Ferrand's offer to go to Cutter Gap? This story follows Christy's life if she had waited another year and a half to go to the mission.

Chapter 1

Ashville was beautiful this time of year. Its southern hospitality was evident even in its summer mornings. As Christy Huddleston took in a full breath of fresh air she was reminded of how blessed she was to live here. Her childhood home had been a comfortable and unshakable foundation in her life. Walking along the picket lined drive, it was hard to imagine a more serene environment. She let out a soft sigh as she wondered out loud, "Where do I go from here, Lord?" This question had been on her heart more then she wanted to admit.

"How could a girl, excuse me, woman be so blessed and yet so…" her trail of thought was broken as she was greeted by the local mail carrier.

"Morning Miss Huddleston. Enjoying the sunshine?"

"What? Oh yes, Mr. Johnson, it is a lovely day isn't it?" She remarked half heartedly. Tucking this mornings mail under her arm, she continued her musings.

Flashback

It had been a year and a half since Christy had refused Dr. Ferrand's offer to go teach in the Smokey Mountains. That decision stay in Ashville had been one of the hardest in Christy's young life; however, at the time she felt as if it was her only choice. She remembered how her heart had been set on fire by the remarkable stories she had heard about this rustic, backwoods mission. An older woman, Christy thought for a moment, yes Miss Henderson was her name, had come to speak to Christy's congregation. Listening to the tales of barefoot children and rifle toten hillbillies had tickled her interest. Christy had never laughed so hard or been more intrigued after hearing Miss Henderson's stories.

"What I would give to see this mission," she whispered to her brother George during the sermon.

"What I would give not to" he quipped back.

"George! Aren't you the least bit interested?"

"I'll tell you what I'm interested in, tomorrow night's game. You realize we're up against? They're second in the district!"

There was no sense continuing this conversation. Once George brought up baseball there was no going back. Christy settled back into the pew. "What's stopping me," she thought quietly? Christy began making a mental note of all the reasons not to talk with Miss Henderson after the service.   
"I only have one year of college left. It would be silly of me to put off my studies for some childish adventure. Besides mother needs me." She almost laughed out loud but quickly caught herself. "Who am I kidding, the only thing mother needs is for me to find a husband. I surely wouldn't accomplish that in Cutter Gap, Tennessee. George will be going to off to college next year though and it would be shame if I missed his last year at home." Suddenly it dawned in her, none of these reasons should keep her from speaking with Miss Herderson. "For heaven's sake, its not as if I'd be running off to marry of backwoods man! I'm not even suggesting that I leave home. All I want to do is speak with her!" With that last thought, Christy made up her mind. There was nothing wrong with asking a few innocent questions.

With the last few members filing out of the church building, Christy excused herself from her family and snuck back inside. Miss Henderson was gathering up the last of her things when Christy cleared her throat.

"Excuse me, Miss Henderson?"

Looking up Alice Henderson saw the petite outline of a young girl standing next to her.

"Yes child?" she replied.

"My name is Christy Huddleston. I was very moved by your stories. This Cutter Gap sounds like a very special place."

"It is that! God has blessed those woods with a very special purpose; however, it is sometimes hard to see that purpose through the dirt and poverty. It has been my unique privilege to serve His people there."

"Yes, I can imagine there is plenty that God can accomplish there. Do you often have people, from the city I mean, come to visit?"

As if not hearing the initial questions Alice Henderson interjected, "Tell me, if you don't mind my asking, how old are you Miss Huddleston?"

This new topic surprised Christy. "Oh please don't be concerned about my age. I'll be turning twenty in a few months!"

"Do not be alarmed child. Thy age does not worry me! Quite the opposite in fact. It is thy youthful spirit that interests me. What caused thee to seek me out just now?" Never one to miss a thing, Miss Henderson's heart was already lifting up prayers to God concerning this young women.

"Caused me to seek you out? I'm not sure what you mean Miss Henderson."

"I can see it in thine face that thou art full of questions. Your curiosity is a gift from God!"

Somewhat taken aback from the direction this conversation was taking, Christy suddenly felt like she was losing control of the situation. It had only been her intention to ask a few questions. Instead she felt as if she were in an interview. Without thinking first Christy blurted out. "My curiosity is one characteristic that my mother would not say was a gift from God! However, I think curiosity is a necessity, especially if I am to become a school teacher." Now Christy realized she might have said to much. This polite woman had no interest in Christy's personal life. Why was she rambling so?

"Is that your plan, Miss Huddleston? To teach?"

"I, um, well, that is I am studying to become a teacher, yes. However, I am not exactly sure how God plans to use me yet."

"What a perfect answer! Would thee be inclined to hear about a teaching position at one of our missions?"

Christy's mind was in complete shock "WHAT" she silently screamed. "Oh no Lord, this is definitely not what I had in mind! Surely you don't want me to follow this woman back to Tennessee?" Filled with her own questions, she realized that she had not answered the question at hand.

Out loud Christy answered "You have a teaching position open? I would love to hear more about it!" To herself to whispered "Crazy girl, what are you doing?"

"Why don't I arrange a meeting between yourself and Dr. Ferrand. He is the director of our missions. Of course, I will be there as well. Tomorrow afternoon we can meet for a light lunch at my hotel. Can you make it?"

Christy had made the lunch and walked away from the meeting more excited and confused then the day before. Dr. Ferrand had been much more intimidating than Christy expected and she was glad for Miss Henderson's company. Sunday's speech had only been a glimpse into life at the mission. While Dr. Ferrand had not meant to scare the young woman, he also did not want to give her a false sense of security. At the end of the discussion the three had agreed to spend the next week in prayer before making any decisions. Once again Christy found herself in awe of what had transpired. Lying in bed that night Christy tried to make sense of what was going on around her.

"Lord, if anyone understands this situation it is you. None of this surprises you. None of this even unsettles you. Let me find peace in that knowledge. Remind me that you have already seen the outcome and you have already planned my path. I am excited Jesus and I am ready to serve you in those mountains. Speak to me. I am listening." With those last words Christy surrendered herself to God and to her pillow. End Flashback


	3. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Leafing through the mail in her arms, Christy planted herself on the top step of the front porch. It was much too glorious outside to go back in already. Looking down the street at the well-groomed houses, Christy had to smile at the Victorian grace they offered. No one who passed by this street could question its place is society. "Funny how even wood and pavement can exude status!" As this slightly rebellious thought crossed her mind Christy had to remind herself how grateful she should feel. She did not feel grateful, however. No, Christy Huddleston felt lost. She hated to admit that feeling. To admit she had no direction meant admitting defeat. Defeat was never an easy concept for Christy to grasp. As a young child she had eagerly preached to others that losing the battle did not necessary mean losing the war. However, as the world's harsh realities had slowly crept into her subconscious the idealistic fairytale Christy Huddleston lived in seemed to become harder to believe. Thinking back she couldn't quite recall when her young heart first began "learning life's lessons." That was the phrase her mother always used when in reality she was trying to tell Christy to toughen up.

"When did I become so cynical?" Christy asked the daisies that lined the flowerbed. "I swear this is not who I am, really its not!" As she began to give excuses to the blooming perennials, her own mind wasn't quite sure she believed herself. "Why am I even trying to explain myself to you? All you have to do is look pretty and smell sweet, what would you know about the real world?" The emphasis she placed on her last sentence suddenly made Christy laugh. Her laugh was real, almost tangible. It cleared her senses and relaxed the muscles around her big blue eyes. The humor of this whole situation was not lost on her. "Imagine if mother found me out here arguing with her prized Gerbers! Then I would really need to explain myself!" She laughed again. It felt good to laugh just like it felt good to sit in the sunshine and soak up the day. Suddenly it dawned on Christy that she couldn't remember what had brought about this dramatic tirade in the first place. "Oh yes," she giggled "the mail!" Reaching to pick up the abandoned stack she sighed as she remembered a very similar day a year and a half ago.

Flashback

"Look at you my beautiful girl! And where are you bounding off to this afternoon?" Christy's father smiled at her from over the banister as she hastened to open the front door.

From off in the kitchen Julia Huddleston's southern voice could be heard yelling, "Sophisticated ladies do not 'bound,' they glide! Don't encourage her William!" "Sophisticated ladies do not yell either, but that doesn't stop mother" Chistry whispered back to her father. They both tried to stifle their laughter at the risk of being over heard. "I'm just running, excuse me, 'gliding' down to get the mail. I'll be right back" she winked at Mr. Huddleston before closing the door behind her. He had always been proud of his girly, but lately he had sensed an even larger force at work in his daughter's life. She seemed full of spirit and joy, but the reason behind it all was still a mystery. It had only been a few weeks since her lunch with Miss Henderson and Dr. Ferrand. He wondered if that could have had anything to do with her 'bounding' attitude. Watching Christy through an upstairs window, he noticed her eyes intently reading through a letter as she retraced her steps up the walk. She paused suddenly and then raised her face towards the sky with an obviously sigh of pleasure. Had he opened the window he might have caught the last whispered words of praise Christy was lifting up to God.

End Flashback

As so many people learn, looking back on the past often sheds light on the present and this was no less true for Christy Huddleston. Moving to the porch swing for shelter from the warming sun, she wondered if she had kept that letter from Dr. Ferrand. Surely she had stored it safely away somewhere, possibly stuffed in some shoe box in the back of her closet. Yes, Christy had no doubt that she had made the right decision to stay in Ashville. So many things had hinged on her presence at home; yet, she could not help but question if God still had more planned for her life then what this traditional, two-story Victorian could offer. At the time, her parents had been adamant about her completing her studies at the University and it was difficult for Christy to argue with their logic. Her father's health had declined that year as well and she knew her mother had been thankful for her daughter's support. George, too, had depended on her as he finished his last year at the local high school. With her parents focused on her father's health, it had been left to Christy to help George interview at colleges and complete his many applications. While it had been difficult to balance his needs with her own academic responsibilities, Christy was secretly thankful to have an excuse to spend so much time with her younger brother before he was off to start his own adventures. In a way she was jealous that his story was just beginning while she felt hers had been put on hold indefinitely. It wasn't a selfish feeling, but more a feeling of pent of energy that she was more then ready to release.

Christy could not argue that the past year and a half had been a busy one. There were very few free moments when she could sit quietly and lament her situation. In fact, it was not until that very moment that she stopped long enough to take a good, true look at her present life. She had often thought about the past and even more often dreamt about her future, but she had not once thought to consider where her present circumstances had placed her. It was then, at that very second that the Holy Spirit gently whispered the words that Christy had been longing to hear, "Its time." She heard it or rather felt it, but either way she knew it was clear. Leaving the unopened mail sitting on the front swing, she quickly threw open the front door and skipping every other step ran up to her childhood bedroom. Grabbing random shoeboxes from every corner of her closet, Christy began sorting through each old memory in hopes of finding the lost letter. Little did Christy realize that her sudden burst of determination was in reality God's soft hand leading her towards a blossoming future.


	4. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

The green of the summer trees were nothing but a blur as the train blew past. The many passengers on board could be heard remarking on the beauty of the hillsides or commenting on excitement of the ride. None of these conversations interested Christy Huddleston, she was hardly aware that anyone else was even on the train. She was, however, keenly aware of how quickly the train was moving her towards her destination. When Christy had first boarded in Ashville she had hoped to distract herself by sketching the myriad of wild flowers that seemed to over take the countryside. It wasn't long though before her pencil was abandoned and the sketchpad sat lifelessly in her lap. Watching the whirl of color fly past her seemed to remind Christy of the swirling feeling in her stomach. Waiting for this day had been the only thing on Christy's mind for several weeks now. In all honesty, she had been waiting for this day much longer then that, but she was not about to let herself get lost in the past.

Cutter Gap, Tennessee was waiting for Christy as well. The mission house had been a buzz of excitement ever since the news of Christy's arrival had been received. Secretly, Miss Alice Henderson had never given up hope that the young lady from Ashville would find her way to these mountains. She had been sorely disappointed to learn that Dr. Ferrand's offer had not been accepted; however, who was she to argue with the Lord's will or timing. Now it appeared that God had been planning for this day all along and what a blessing it was to see Him at work. The mission rooms had been swept and dusted. The kitchen wiped down and a warm basket of biscuits was ready to be enjoyed as soon as the newest member arrived. Miss Alice was not the least bit surprised when she saw the children making their way from the schoolhouse towards the mission lawn. She did not expect that they would want to rush home until after they had a nice good look at this new city lady. Following behind the last student was Miss Rachel Livingston, the mission's schoolteacher. She had been asked to come to the mission after Christy refused the position and Miss Rachel had indeed been a blessing.

"Were thy students attentive today, Miss Livingston?" Alice knew the answer before she even asked the question.

"Attentive would not be the word I would choose actually. Perhaps curious is a better word." She smiled at Miss Alice and began to explain, "They were not as interested in the location of England on the map as they were of Ashville. It never ceases to amaze me how small their world really is."

"That is a good observation Miss Livingston. It is easy for us to mistake their naivety for ignorance, when in fact it is simply that all their experiences, and that of their parents, have rarely extended past these mountains." Rachel always enjoyed sharing thoughts with Miss Alice. The younger woman was very much aware of the fact that she had much to learn from the elder and she welcomed that idea.

Looking out over the mission's clearing it was hard to deny the joy on each of their faces. Both young and old were visibly excited over this new comer. It was truly a momentous occasion when these children were able to meet people from outside the cove. They never seemed to tire of Miss Rachel's stories and often wished they had their own to share. A few had been lucky enough to watch the train pull into the station down in El Pano, but none of these youngsters had yet to actually ride on one. Trains were a wonderful mystery to the children of the cove. They were certain of two things. Trains brought new wonders and occasionally took away old friends; however the latter was often forgotten in the excitement of the first. When Miss Rachel first came to the cove it was a long and difficult journey to gain acceptance by the families there. She had marveled at how their longstanding traditions and superstitions had hindered her attempt at progress. Now, a year and a half later, she was beginning to see the fruits of her labor and was thankful that Miss Huddleston would be there for support. Now if only she would just get here!

Standing alone and quite obviously out of place, Christy Huddleston scanned the near empty platform for a familiar face. She had already reconciled herself to the fact that Miss Alice would not be meeting here at the station; however, there was a small part of her that already longed to see someone she recognized. Watching the minutes tick by on her small wristwatch, Christy began to question if anyone was actually going to come for her. A myriad of scenarios played through her head, all of which included her being stranded, completely alone. Christy could feel her entire body start to tense and suddenly realized the terrified look that was sneaking onto her face.  
"Wonderful Christy!" She chastised herself. "You only just stepped off the train and you're already imaging the worst possibilities. This will never do!" She released a rather long and determined breath, "No, this will never do. God has brought me this far and I will not turn and run. So help me, I will hike up these skirts and walk all the way to that mission if I have to!" With this new burst of courage, Christy's eyes began searching for something, anything that would point her in the right direction. Lost in her own thoughts she barely noticed the handsome young man walking up side her.

Clearing his throat this tall stranger attempted to gain her attention, but to no avail. "Excuse me?" He paused, then tried again, "Miss Huddleston I believe?"

At the sound of her own name Christy quickly turned around and nearly lost her balance in the process.

"Why yes, that's me!" She responded a little to enthusiastically. No sooner had the words escaped her lips then her eyes focused in on the charming, if not somewhat boyish features of the man addressing her.

"Oh pardon me" she tried to collect herself by offer her small hand, "I, um, I mean, yes sir, I am Miss Huddleston." Her sudden attempt at decorum obviously humored the man and she felt herself blushing profusely under his smiling gaze.

"I apologize Miss Huddleston, I did not mean to startle you" his words rang with kindness, but Christy had the distinct feeling that this man was laughing at her. "My name in David Grantland. I am reverend at Cutter Gap."

Christy was shocked. She had often envisioned working side by side with the cove's preacher, but she had always pictured an older, heavy set man complete with a grandmotherly wife. This, however, was definitely a more pleasing situation! Christy was surprised at her brazen thoughts. She had only just met the man and here she was…oh, no, she wouldn't let her mind go there. Trying to regain a little control she responded, "Oh, Mr. Grantland, how nice to meet you. I was beginning to wonder if I should start asking for directions to the mission." There! She would show him that she too had a sense of humor! Maybe if she made him laugh then he wouldn't notice the color of her cheeks.

"Yes, well I am glad it didn't come to that. Our school teacher Rach, errr, Miss Livingston had the unfortunate experience of hiking all the way to Cutter Gap," he stopped to pick up her few bags. "We were hoping to save you from having the same first impression of the cove." Speaking of first impressions, David was working very hard to hide his own pleasure at meeting Christy face to face. It was hard to ignore her petite frame and deep blue eyes. It was true, Miss Huddleston's appearance would be very hard to ignore and he quietly chastised himself for thinking so.

Following the reverend to where the horses were tied, Christy attempted to shift her focus away from the young preacher and onto safer subjects. This Miss Livingston seemed like an interesting choice. Christy tried to imagine what it would have been like for the schoolteacher when she first arrived. It had been such a source of peace for Christy to know that Rachel would be there to help her get settled. Christy wondered how much more difficult of a time Miss Rachel must have had without anyone to relate to. Remembering that she was originally supposed to have come in Rachel's place, Christy wondered if she would have had the same amount of courage that this young lady had.

"That was why I volunteered to come meet you myself" David brought her thoughts back to the conversation. "I would have felt awful if you been left to trek up the mountain as well!"

"Thank you for your concern, Reverend. I'd like to think I would have been willing to walk, but I'd rather not have to prove it!" She laughed as she thought of how close she had actually come.

"I have complete faith in you, Miss Huddleston, but I would hate to give up our ride together just so that you can go frolicking through the woods. " His mood was carefree and contagious. Christy was certain that she was going to like this David Grantland. In only a matter of minutes he had managed to quiet her nervous stomach and lighten her heavy heart.


	5. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

The heat of the day was beginning to make its way through the heavily shaded woods. Hoof beats could be heard slowly moving across the path obviously in no rush to meet their destination. Usually the summer's sticky presence would have annoyed the lone rider; however, it is difficult to be annoyed when one is sleeping in the saddle. Dr. Neil MacNeill may have grown up amongst these towering trees, but even he had to concede that his faithful horse knew the way better. To many nights had pasted between them when the Doctor had to trust Charlie's keen sense of direction and light footing in order to make it home safely. It was mid-day now and Dr. MacNeill was thankfully taking advantage of a moments rest.

The night before had been long and teditious. Jedidiah Ansell had burst through the doctor's door close to super time yelling for the Doc to come save his boy. Little Jacob Ansell had broken his leg while trying to prove to his brothers he could jump from the roof of their barn onto the hay wagon below. Dr. MacNeill had arrived two hours later to find a compound fracture and very scared little boy. Unfortunately this was not anything new for the cove's only doctor. In reality it was simply another in a long list of complicated procedures MacNeill had been preparing himself for as they rode into the yard. Now in the afternoon light the doctor's exhaustion from his "miracle working," as the Ansell's had called it, showed heavily on his sleeping face. This had been a good night with few problems and a quick thinking family who helped instead of hindered his work. To often he had arrived at a cabin only to find that the family's attempts at healing had taken him hours to reverse or even worse, had cost the life of his patient. Jacob Ansell would be hurting for several weeks, but at least Dr. MacNeill knew he was safely resting in his own bed. Suddenly feeling the gentle rocking of Charlie's steps coming to a halt, Neil MacNeill slowly raised his head as he took in the rustic cabin in front of him.

"Home" he sighed as he slid off Charlie's back and began leading him towards the barn. Despite his semi-conscious state Dr. MacNeill remembered he had made a promise to Alice Henderson to restock the mission medicine cabinet today. Breathing deeply he decided to take a chance and hope they wouldn't need any supplies until tomorrow.

"It will just have to wait," he whispered to himself as he closed the cabin door behind him.

************************************************************************

Without a doubt, some afternoons are simply more beautiful then others. The sun wakes up and seems to make a deliberate decision to shine more brightly that day. Surely the birds have some unspoken bond that calls them to sing in perfect harmony. The babbling brooks sparkle with the luster of diamonds and even the wind blows the sweet aroma of the earth through its breath. It is in the most untamed landscapes that one can finally understand how the whole earth cries out in praise to God. Riding through the rugged, overgrown trails of the Mountains, Christy's own heart was singing out praises as the stared in awe at her surroundings. She had never felt further away from home; however, despite her racing pulse, she felt a complete peace envelope her. There was no questioning her place in these mountains. She did not know when or how God would show her the next step in her journey, but she knew that she was walking in the right direction.

Her inner sense of contentment must have shown in her big blue eyes because their innocence and beauty were not lost on the preacher. He could not deny that he had been surprised by her delicate features and enchanting smile. When she turned to meet him, David Grantland had almost been at a loss for words and that is not a common trait in a minister. Thinking back, David was sincerely thankful that he had not forgotten his own name and offered up a quick "thank you" to God. It was hard to keep his eyes on the road when he was so curious about the young lady sitting next to him. She was spirited, that was certain. In no less then 3 seconds she had made that perfectly clear! A smile spread across his chiseled face, "she and Rachel will get along just fine" he remarked to himself, "and heaven help the rest of us!" This last thought brought a chuckle to his lips and broke Christy's reverie.

"Did you say something Reverend Grantland?"

"No, Miss Huddleston. I was simply thinking about what a wonderful pair you and Miss Livingston will make."

"Oh? And what makes you say that Reverand?" Christy wasn't sure if she should take that as compliment or an insult, after all they had only just met and she had already been more then abrupt with the man.

"Please no more of this 'Reverend' stuff" he smiled gently down at her. "My name is David and I hope you will feel free to use my 'front name' as the inhabitants of the cove would say."

"In that case, _David_, what makes you think that Miss Livingston and I would get along?"

"Simple! You both seem to share a light hearted personality, you both are young and active, and you are both going to pair up against me I can promise you that!" He threw his head back laughing at his own joke.

Christy couldn't help but chime in with his laughter. Jostling around another bend Christy was once again taken back by the panoramic view surrounding her. How had she gone through so many years of her life without knowing such beauty existed in the world?

"David!" she exclaimed. "It is all simply to much to take in!" Christy giggled as she spoke overcome with excitement and wonder.

"You say that now Christy, but wait until you see what those mountains are capable of! Its ridiculous how you can think you're making a difference here and then suddenly you get knocked right off your feet. You'll see, its like we're always taking one step forward and two steps back."

"Hense the term 'God Forsaken'?" Christy tilted her head questioningly. "Really David, I'm surprised to hear this from the cove's preacher. Shouldn't you be telling me how easy it is to lose yourself in God's creation and move closer to Him instead of fearing what He's given us?"

"Ha! You sound just like I did when I made this first trip." Christy couldn't help but notice his patronizing tone. "Trust me Miss Huddleston. God is here, but He doesn't make it easy to find Himself."

This conversation wasn't following a direction Christy liked. It was hard to ignore David's charming smile and boyish good looks, but she simply did not handle condescension well. Christy had never considered herself proud, but she also liked to be treated as an equal and at the moment she felt more like a child. Perhaps she had jumped to deep into a subject she knew nothing about. Still, this was God's creation surrounding her and she couldn't help but feel His power surge through her. What David had said may be true, but Christy felt strongly that God would not be as hard to find as David had suggested.

"There Christy," David spoke up. "Do you see over the hill? It's the church steeple. I built the building with my own two hands. You wouldn't believe how hard it was to get that steeple straight," he laughed. "The mission is just over the rise."

Sure enough she could just see the mission house coming into view. It was constructed of weathered wood and shutters that obviously hadn't been painted recently, but it had a welcoming front porch and there on the steps was finally a familiar face.

"Oh David, its Miss Alice!"

"And apparently the entire Cutter Gap school" David added.

The wagon slowly pulled into the yard and within seconds Christy was surrounded by tiny heads, lanky figures, grimy hands, and most importantly smiling faces. Each child was struggling to get a better look at this new stranger.

"Howdy ma'am. I be Creed Allen and this here be my pal Sam Houston. We'd like to offer you a mighty fine welcome into our cove." Creed's grin was from ear to ear and it was obvious he had been rehearsing. Sam Houston attempted to add something to the speech, but ended up just nodding in agreement.

"And Miss Huddleston my name be Ruby Mae Morrison. I'm right proud to be sharing my room with ya! I even cleaned this here whole mission just so'd you'd feel right at home with us. It weren't nothing special, just a way to let you know we're rightly excited for you to be joining us…"

"Ruby Mae" a soft voice interrupted. Gently pushing through the crowd of people, a young women approached. "Miss Huddleston, I am Rachel Livingston the school teacher. As you can see we've all been waiting for your arrival; however I am sure you must be tired so I'd be more then happy to help get you settled inside." Just as sweetly as she had introduced herself the young woman turned to her crowd of children. "It was awfully kind of each of you to stay after school in order to welcome Miss Huddleston. Now that she has had a chance to see each of your smiling faces I believe it is time to be heading back to your cabins. Miss Huddleston will be joining us in our classes soon and you will have plenty of opportunities to get to know her better then." Turning once again to Christy she continued, "Come right this way Miss Huddleston. I have someone who has been waiting as very long time to see you!"

Moving towards the mission steps Christy once again became aware of Alice Henderson's presence. The joyful expression that was found in her eyes was just as contagious as it had been during her message over a year ago.

"Miss Huddleston, it makes my heart happy to be able to welcome thee into our mission today. I never doubted God's desire to have thee here and it is a blessing to see His will lived out among us!" Such heart felt words touched Christy's soul and the peace she felt as this woman reached out her arms was overwhelming.

"Please Miss Henderson, I would prefer it if you would call me Christy. I already feel so at home in this place. Is it possible to feel loved with in seconds of arriving?" She laughed.

"Oh yes Christy! It is very possible" Miss Livingston responded. "And since we are on the subject please call me Rachel."

"Enough of the mushy stuff" David laughed as he pushed past the three loaded down with Christy's trunks. "I'm sure Christy would like to see her room.

Following the others into the house Christy stopped for one moment and turned back towards the mountains. Something inside her heart felt at rest as her eyes adjusted to the light sinking behind the peaks.


	6. Chapter 5

September 25, 1913

Dear Mother and Daddy,

It is hard to imagine an entire month has gone by since I last saw your faces. The world here in Cutter Gap may be small but it most certainly is not lacking in activities. Since I have settled into the mission I have already begun learning so many new things, and I thought I was coming to teach! You'll remember Ruby Mae from my past letters. Sharing a room with her has become an activity in and of itself. She is a ball of energy and her tongues doesn't even slow down in her sleep. I am taking it upon myself to teach her some of the recipes that I learned last year from my culinary classes, but I have yet to see any real change in her possum creations.

Rachel and I are completely in tune when it comes to handling the classes. She is still the "head mistress" as David jokingly calls her, but I am becoming more and more comfortable handling parts of the school day all by myself. I think she and I are a good combination. Can you imagine handling a class of 72 with out any other help? That isn't exactly true, Rachel has help from David teaching math and Bible. I've also been told the cove's doctor teaches science classes occasionally, but I haven't had a chance to witness him teach yet.

David truly is a blessing. He has done so much for the cove already, but I can tell he is still searching for something. The people seem to enjoy his sermons and I have learned a lot from our talks of the Bible. He is only a few years older than I am; however he relishes the idea of passing on his scriptural knowledge. He is also teaching me how to ride a horse with very little luck. Thankfully he has patience because apparently I have no talent.

Miss Alice has enjoyed introducing me to our neighbors here in the cove. She regularly takes me walking so that we can stop in and check on the local families. I had not realized how much walking would be required and definitely need a new pair of shoes. The other day we were out visiting and came across Dr. Neil MacNeill the cove's physician. I know it is wrong to be so harsh, but the doctor's manners leave much to be desired. He is a difficult man to describe…

…at this point in her letter Christy stopped. Dr. MacNeill's manners, his entire personality had been irritating her for several days now. This back woods doctor, even with all his big city training, most certainly did not merit much worth in Christy Huddlston's eyes. She remembered their first meeting last week and shook her head.

{FLASH BACK}

"As thee can see, Miss Huddleston, our mission has many facets. There is no one way to reach out to the people of the cove and we must be flexible in our approach to their needs." Miss Alice and Christy had just left the decrepit cabin of Swannie O'Teale and it was obvious Christy needed an explanation. Before the older woman could continue there was a sound of hoof beats in the distance. Pausing a moment, Alice waited to see who the approaching rider could be and then breaking through a patch of over grown grasses Dr. Neil MacNeill made his entrance. Neil had just finished examining a case of food poising from over the ridge. It was not one of his worse cases; however, the side effects had not been pleasant either. His appetite was lost as soon as he set foot inside the cabin and now he was thankful for the breath of fresh air. Rounding the bend Neil noticed Alice Henderson waiting for him by the path. Along side her was an unfamiliar, though very attractive, young woman.

"Must be Rachel's new assistant" he thought to himself as he brought Charlie to a halt beside them.

"Hello Alice, from your direction I imagine you're heading to or from the O'Teale cabin." His deep brogue caught Christy off guard. The wrinkled clothes and unshaven appearance had distracted her until she heard that voice. Without meaning to she found herself smiling up at this stranger hoping to hear more.

"Yes Neil, you're quite observant as always" Alice noticed the silly grin pass over Christy's face and saw Neil had not missed it either. "I see you have also noticed our newest member at the mission, Miss Christy Huddleston."

"How do you do Miss Huddleston?" the doctor carelessly swung down from his saddle and extended a hand. Christy couldn't help but notice his comfort with the animal, she was also keenly aware of how strong and confident he looked as he had glanced down at her from his horse. "I'm Neil MacNeill the cove's doctor. I believe I had just missed you the other day when I stopped by the mission. You had just left for classes and I was in to much of a hurry to stay." Each syllable tickled Christy's ear and she found it difficult to stop smiling. "Tis a shame" he continued spurred on by her charming demour, "I had been looking forward to making your acquaintance; however, I am thankful for the chance meeting now." His large calloused hand had held hers just long enough to send a wave of heat through her arm. Christy tried to collect herself and respond.

"Yes Doctor, I've heard so much about you. Rachel is constantly singing your praises. She says you are quite the natural with the children. Hopefully I'll be able to see you in action soon, we'd love to have you teach another class." Inwardly Christy thought, "There that didn't sound to childish, very professional in fact!"

Reinserting herself in the conversation Alice eyed up his saddle bags and then turned to Neil. "Tell me, Neil, has thee just returned from a call?" Pulling himself away from Christy's gaze he noticed Alice's raised eyebrow.

"Aye Alice, but I assume you already knew that." What was she getting at?

"And am I to assume that jug hanging from your saddle was some sort of payment?" She continued.

"Aye, once again you are correct." He would say no more.

The air suddenly changed between the two and Christy was beginning to feel uncomfortable.

"Dr. MacNeill we have had this discussion before" Alice's tone turned professional. "How are we to instill the need for peace amongst these people if you are accepting moonshine as payment for thy services?"

"Thankfully, Miss Henderson" he too could play this game "my payment system is none of your concern. You know just as well as I that these people would as soon die from lack of medical attention then allow me to treat them unpaid!" His voice was rising as was the hair on Christy's neck.

"Do not lecture me on the nature of these people Neil. We have sacrificed and worked hard just like you in order to create a new way of life here. The mission can not and will not stand for the making of moonshine, but how can we fight against it when our own doctor will not put his foot down."

"Alice you try my patience! These are my people and will not stand by and watch them suffer because they have no means of paying me. You have made your moral choice and I respect that; however my first concern are my patience and if that means accepting moonshine then so help me, Woman, I will! His last words were spoken with such force that Christy could barely keep her composure. Before Alice had a chance to respond Dr. MacNeill had remounted his horse and was galloping off in the distance.

"He will not see reason Miss Huddleston," Miss Alice fumed. "How many times must we have this argument before he will admit the detriment of his actions? It is not in the Quaker ways to speak ill of someone; however in the particular case I am not speaking ill, I am speaking the truth. That man is impossible!"

In the month she had lived in the cove Christy had not once heard her mentor raise her voice. Now she had not only seen Miss Alice practically yelling, but also worked up to the point of anger. Who did this doctor think he was to question Miss Alice's judgment? Surely he had no right to accept such an illegal and unchristian form of payment.

"Miss Alice, I believe you were perfectly right to stand up to Dr. MacNeill" Christy stated. "He obviously does not care about the cove's future the way you do and I, for one, am very disappointed by his behavior!"

Having regained her composure, Alice Henderson gentled smiled at the young woman's words. Although she appreciated the sentiment, Alice knew that the real reason she and the doctor argued was because of his deep devotion to the people of Cutter Gap. She also knew that as Christy learned more about Neil MacNeill her opinions of him would not be so harsh.

"He may have a charming accent and rugged appearance, but I will not be fooled." Although she was only speaking to herself, Christy's mentor could not help but over hear the girlish resolution.

Alice sighed, "Oh the joys of daughters…"


	7. Chapter 6

Watching Rachel Livingston across the yard, Christy realized how much she had come to admire and respect the young woman over the past month and a half. There was something simple though complicated in the way she handled the children, their parents and even the mission folk. There were so many little details about Rachel that Christy couldn't put her finger on. She was quiet, demure, and peaceful. She was also private, reserved and mysterious. Rachel was taller than Christy and her hair had its own brilliant shine that Christy secretly envied. Part of her beauty came from her external appearance yet there was a deeper beauty that was rooted in her passive disposition. After a year and half in the cove it was a wonder that Rachel had maintained so much of her gentility and grace. She accepted the ways of the people and she also remained faithful to her "citified" upbringing. As she was mentally noting each of Rachel's attractive traits she noticed that David was also watching from the entrance to the church.

A little sting pierced through Christy as she became aware of David's open admiration of Rachel. Was it jealousy? Surely not! Why would she be jealous? Her relationship with David had been developing over the past few weeks, but it was nothing beyond friendship. Still, this sudden train of thought surprised Christy and she decided to pay closer attention to David's interaction with both herself and Rachel. As if sensing her thoughts were focused on himself David began to wander towards the mission house. Christy leaned against the railing on the porch and greeted him as he approached.

"Good day David." She beamed, a little more enthusiastic then normal.

"Hi Christy! I've been thinking about you all day. Hope Rachel isn't working you to hard, think you'd want to take a ride with me this afternoon?" His sparkling eyes danced with happiness and she realized it might have something to do with herself.

"Well, it has been a long day. But you know my riding isn't very good yet. I still need a lot of help!" Was she flirting? Why was she suddenly flirting?

"Have no fear fair lady, I'll be happy to have you ride on Prince with me. It'll be fun to spend some time together." Now he was grinning from ear to ear and Christy realized she wasn't sure what she had just agreed to.

"Let me just change into my riding skirt and I'll meet you in the barn."

Turning to go back inside Christy tried to ignore the little voice in her head. "Christy Huddleston you're being silly. He's only being friendly and this is an excellent way to get to know the preacher better. Stop thinking so highly of yourself, remember, he was also just admiring Miss Livingston. For all you know they could have an understanding that you are not aware of." She continued to chastise herself as she returned outside to find David waiting patiently for her.

Seeing David sitting astride Prince, Christy again realized how young and boyish his features were. His face had a little glow from being in the sun to long and his long legs hung low under the horses belly. It slightly reminded her of her brother George riding on their miniature pony at home. She giggled and accepted his outstretched hand.

"Why thank you kind sir" Christy settled herself behind David. "And where are our adventures taking us this fine day?"

"Well madam, I believe we'll just have to allow Prince to lead the way and trust his path." David could already tell it was going to be an enjoyable afternoon. Christy had been taking up more of his attention lately and it wasn't hard to see why. She was playful and charming, but she also knew how to handle a serious Biblical conversation. The first two characteristics he found very attractive and the last he knew would please his mother. He knew she couldn't see him smiling to himself as she rode behind him and David momentarily lost himself in the thought of a future together.

Christy too was lost in thought. David rode Prince a little harder than she would have liked. Perhaps he was trying to show off or perhaps she just wasn't used to the strength in the horses gait. She wrapped her arms around his waist a little more tightly and a light blush crept across her cheeks. Back at home she had always enjoyed the small attentions men gave her. She had never taken advantage of any other their emotions, but it was nice to be petted and admired like a beautiful gem. Life at the mission had been so full of new and overwhelming experiences that the thought of courtship had not even entered her head. Until this very second, that is.

In the distance Christy could hear the rush of water and knew they must be coming close to the river. Her ears did not deceive her and with in moments they were dismounting next to the flowing water.

"This seems like a good spot for a rest, don't you think Christy?" David was still holding her hand after helping her down from the saddle.

Seating themselves down on a dry rock both Christy and David silently took in the beauty around them. Christy thoughts suddenly became more important to her than David's company and she found herself lost in her own reverie.

"Oh Lord," her heart whispered, "what joy and comfort you have brought me in such a short period of time! These mountains, these people, You, every thing that matters is right here at my finger tips."

"You know, Christy" David interrupted, "I was quite the sports man at home. Baseball was my favorite, you ever watch a game?"

Slightly taken aback by lack of depth in David's conversation Christy simply smiled and began telling David about her brother's games in high school. Their talk lasted longer than she was really interested, but she still thought it was sweet that David was trying to get to know her, or at least trying to let her get to know him. In all honesty, most of his words skipped across her ears like rocks across the water, none sinking in until they are unrecognizable.

Out of the corner of her eye, Christy was aware of a moving figure coming along the path. David must have noticed also because he stopped his sentence short and turned in the same direction. Calmly and with complete confidence Dr. Neil MacNeill rode into sight. Over the past few weeks Christy had had very few encounters with the doctor and was perfectly happy to keep it that way. However, she had to admit her irritation at his presence often mirrored the irritation she felt towards herself at not being able to think clearly when he was close by. Thankfully David was with her and perhaps she would not be expected to add much to the conversation. She had never been alone with Dr. MacNeill and grew a little nervous at this new train of thought. This, of course, only irritated her more.

"Hello MacNeill," David began.

"Afternoon Grantland. Miss Huddleston its nice to see you again" hearing her name in that rich brogue ruffled her. Of course he had chosen the focus the conversation on her knowing she could not avoid him. "I apologize for not being more available with the science classes lately. Hopefully you and Miss Livingston will have an opportunity for me soon…"

Christy couldn't tell if he was asking her a question or merely stating a fact. "Certainly Doctor, we'd be happy to include your lesson in our plans. Just let us know when you're available." The answer pleased her. She had not actually set a date and he would probably forget about the offer with his busy schedule.

"Excellent, in that case I'd be glad to stop by tomorrow." Her eyes opened wide as he continued, "I've been remiss in my duties and hope to make amends immediately."

Tomorrow? Of course he would choose tomorrow when Rachel had specifically set aside the day for Christy to start teaching by herself. Why did he always have to be so, so, oh what was he? Irritating! It was simply the best word for it. His words were always articulate and to the point, but something in his eyes made Christy feel she had missed the most important part of the conversation. Silence descended on the trio which made Christy uncomfortable under MacNeill's observant gaze.

"Forgive me for the interruption, Grantland. I'll just be on my way." He knew very well that David was ready for him to move along, but he just couldn't bare to go to easy on the preacher. "Until tomorrow Miss Huddleston, and don't allow the reverend to much liberty alone in these woods." Neil winked, Christy blushed, and David groaned.

Christy was mortified! What? How? Oh he infuriated her. First his lack of respect for Miss Alice and now he was openly mocking herself. Forward, brazen man!

"David, its time to return to the mission." She held her head high and spoke very clearly. She would not allow Neil MacNeill to dictate her actions; but then again, wasn't she doing exactly that by not allowing herself to remain alone with the preacher? Irritating!


	8. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Miss Christy Huddleston stood in front of a class of 72 children and was terrified. There were 72 pairs of eyes on her watching her every move. Technically 73 pairs if you counted Miss Rachel observing in the back. This was exactly what Christy had been waiting for, planning for, even praying for and now she was nauseous.

"Good morning class." That seemed like a good start.

"Good morning Miss Christy," they echoed back.

"Today we are going to give Miss Rachel a little break from teaching and she is going to allow me to teach the full day."

Cheers went up from the each of the students and it brought a smile to both her and Rachel's face. They both knew it was nothing against Rachel personally, it was simply the children trying to show their support of the new teacher. Christy was sure she would not have gotten such an encouraging response from the students in Ashville.

"Now then, lets begin by going over our vocabulary words from yesterday, shall we?"

With that short sentence Christy Huddleston was on her way to teaching her first full day. Rachel watched her from a small chair near the door. She quietly lifted up prayers to the Lord for Christy's presence and also thanked Him for a moments rest for herself. She and Christy had stayed up late the night before going over every lesson and preparing each activity. There was no doubt in her mind concerning Christy's ability, but she knew Christy had plenty of doubts herself. As the morning progressed Christy found herself relaxing and even laughing a little at her own mistakes. The children were obedient and it soon became obvious that Christy was taking herself much more seriously then they were. Soon Miss Rachel was announcing the lunch hour and every one seemed ready for a break.

"I'm so proud of you Christy!" Rachel and Christy sat on the steps of the schoolhouse half yelling at the boys to leave the girls alone and half eating their sandwiches. "It took a lot of courage for you to begin today and I want you know that you truly are a God send to me."

"Oh Rachel, how do you do it? I was, still am, so scared I'm going to completely mess up. What if I teach them something incorrectly or what if I forget the most important part of the lesson?" Christy's face showed signs of panic.

"Just relax and take a deep breath. You've seen for yourself how forgiving these students are. They are on your same team and so am I! Trust me, I've made plenty of mistakes and I still have plenty more I'm going to make. Soon enough the fear of failing is outweighed by being delighted in the little successes. You'll see, just be patient." They both sighed contentedly as they basked in the warm sun.

Rachel continued, "Plus Christy, Dr. MacNeill is coming to finish the day with a science lesson so you're almost finished with your first day of teaching!" She meant to calm Christy's fears, but Rachel had just unknowingly multiplied Christy's nerves.

Of course, how had she forgotten? Christy had been so wrapped up in the day that she had completely forgotten about the science lesson. "Please Lord," she prayed, "Don't let him come until after I'm finished, I'd be so mortified if he sees me mess up!" Even to her own ears the prayer sounded silly. Since when was Christy Huddleston concerned with Dr. MacNeill's opinion of her? She most certainly did not have a very good opinion of him so why should she desire his? Either way that man had a way of agitating her every nerve and she had enough to deal with today with out adding _him_ to the list.

The rest of the afternoon passed by so smoothly that Christy almost forgot about the doctor, _almost_ being the key word. Towards the end of her geography lesson she noticed Rachel sneak out the door and wondered what could have called her away. Moments later she saw Rachel return with Dr. MacNeill in tow. There seemed to be a lingering look on both of their faces and neither one noticed Christy as she approached.

"Thank you for coming today, Doctor" Christy would not allow her voice to falter. She would show him that she was strong and in command. This was her ground and he was the guest.

"Hum, what?" MacNeill had been caught off guard. "Yes Miss Huddleston, well, ah, yes, thank you," He managed to stutter. HA! She had done it, Christy Huddleston had unnerved the great Neil MacNeill. Before she could truly revel in her glory though she noticed Rachel gently pull her hand out of doctor's as he moved to the front of the class.

"Oh" was all Christy could whisper as Rachel's eyes pleaded for silence.

Looking back, Christy could not remember a single word from the science lesson.


	9. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

The afternoon sky looked more like late evening as large thunder clouds rolled in from the east. Far off in the distance the rumble of the storm echoed through the mountain valleys, it wouldn't be long now until the whole cove would be dripping wet. Any one else would have quickly sought out shelter from the on coming fury, but the young women seated in the mission gazebo were not paying any attention to the sky. They weren't paying any particular attention to each other either. It was as if the two were strangers who just happen to be sitting on the same wooden bench. This had been a recurring theme between the school teachers for over three weeks. They had both managed to keep up an appearance of normality, but as the November chill began to descend on the school house neither one could ignore the inevitable. Although it was many weeks past, Christy still felt like an intruder who had been caught invading the privacy of the woman sitting beside her. Rachel had never offered an explanation and Christy respected her friend to much to force a confidence from her. She had not meant to see the loving gesture that had passed between Rachel and the doctor. She had not meant to memorize the gentle look that was in the doctor's eyes. She most certainly had not meant to interrupt the personal moment they were sharing. All Christy had intended to do was show Neil MacNeill she wasn't scared of him. For some reason though she did feel scared.

Empty eyes stared past Christy into the recently harvested field behind her. Rachel had kept her secret so long that it had caused her to push away the one person she had loved like a sister. All she wanted was to pull Christy closer, but in one moment of weakness she had widened the distance between them. Sitting there in total silence Rachel wasn't purposely avoiding her friend, in fact she had specifically asked for her company. Now, however, she was at a loss for words and the longer she sat the less she had to say. This was not supposed to happen. No one was supposed to know; she had made that perfectly clear to Neil from the very beginning. It wasn't that she was ashamed and it wasn't that she enjoyed keeping secrets. It was simply that her heart was not ready and this recent turn of events made her realize how far from being ready she really was.

"Please say something, Christy" Rachel let out a long sigh. "Please say anything." The desperate tone in the woman's voice was unmistakable.

"I'm not sure what _to_ say, Rachel. I've felt awful about what I saw. I never meant to see it, I promise!"

"Oh Christy! That isn't at all what I meant!" Rachel now turned and looked directly into her friend's eye. "Oh please tell me you haven't been feeling guilty this whole time!" The hurt expression on Christy's face said it all. "No, Christy. I could never be mad at you! I've only been angry at myself. I've made such a mess of things and now I'm making such mess of our friendship."

"Rachel, I treasure your friendship, you have to know that! I just thought this whole time that you were avoiding me because, well because…" It was a moment when Christy was completely lost. There was nothing else to say because she knew nothing about what was going on. She had spent nights on end imagining all of the possibilities and trying to understand why her heart seemed so tangled over what she had seen. Nothing made sense to Christy and it was taking all her strength to sit there quietly instead of begging for answers. She reached over and took Rachel's hand in her own. Rachel's long, delicate fingers were soft and warm to the touch. Christy compared them to her short little fingers, her brother had always teased that they were stubby. Suddenly Christy remembered this same hand being held by Dr. MacNeill and felt her heart go numb. Quietly she thought to herself, "No wonder he enjoys holding her hand, she's simply perfect." The thought contained no malice or envy, only a simple understanding of why a man, _that_ man, would love this precious friend of hers.

"There is really nothing to tell you," Rachel's interruption brought Christy's attention back to the present. "There is no understanding, we are not courting, it is only friendship." The sadness in her voice did not make her statement very convincing.

"Rachel, you know there would be nothing wrong if you were, you were in a…" Christy faltered, how should she say it? Why was that word sticking in her throat, choking her so that it would not be released? She began again, "…a relationship with the doctor."

"Ha!" Rachel let out a true laugh. "This coming from the girl who is most adamantly against Neil MacNeill in every possible way!" Apparently Christy's personal opinions of the doctor had not been missed by Rachel. In fact very few people were not aware of Christy's firm stance against the Dr. MacNeill. It made Christy wince to think that her judgmental comments had kept Rachel from coming to her sooner. "Why the sudden change of heart, darling? I never considered you a romantic." Rachel was teasing her now and it made Christy happy to see an up turn in the conversation.

"Oh have no fear, I still think Dr. MacNeill is wanting in many areas," Christy giggled although she now felt the need to redeem herself, "However, I just meant that I have seen no reason for you to hide a relationship. Is there any reason in particular?"

"Its so complicated Christy. At first, when Neil and I had just begun spending more time together, I told him that we had to keep things private because of his lack of faith." She paused, "Oh, that's right, you wouldn't have known that. Okay let me go further back."

It was not a particularly dramatic story, but the sadness and hurt in Rachel voice was enough to break Christy's heart. About a year ago when Rachel was still relatively new to Cutter Gap she had begun to have feelings for the doctor. Although it had taken a lot of effort on both their parts they had finally shared their growing feelings with each other. Neil had been resolutely against God from the moment they met and Rachel knew she could never sacrifice her faith in order to be with him. In the beginning she thought that their faith was the only thing keeping them apart, but then the most miraculous thing happen; Neil MacNeill accepted Christ as his savior. It was the most exciting blessing and joyous news Rachel had ever heard. She had assumed this would solve all their problems.

"That was about six months ago, Christy" the woman continued. "This is going to sound horrible, but we are friends and I must be honest with some one even if I haven't been honest with myself." She squeezed Christy's hand and began again. "I should be shouting from the heavens, I should be proudly exclaiming to every member of the cove that Neil MacNeill loves me, but instead I keep telling Neil that I'm not ready. It still has to be a secret. Don't you see, it makes no sense. The longer I wait the more confused I become and the more I hurt Neil. He doesn't understand at all and I don't have any answers for him." There she had said it. Now at least one other person could share her secret and at least of little of her pain.

Again quiet enveloped the two friends. Christy bit her lip as if that would some how allow her brain to process the information more rapidly. It was bad habit she knew, but even as a child the small action always helped her concentrate. "Have you ever considered that maybe your feelings aren't as deep as you originally thought?" The question sounded lame even to Christy's ears. Of course she would have thought that or else she wouldn't be struggling. "I suppose what I mean is that if you have not found peace, if you have not felt God's peace about Neil then perhaps that is your answer." It was the first time she had called "the doctor" by his first name. Feeling it roll off her tongue felt foreign, as if she were presuming a right that had not been given to her.

"I know, I know! But I feel like there are so many expectations. I hate the thought of hurting him, but

at the same time that's exactly what I'm doing now." Rachel was obviously becoming more upset and small pools of water started to tear in her eyes.

"Its not my place to tell you what to do Rachel. I will always be here though and I will be praying, I promise."

Something broke in Rachel's eyes. A moment of true fire and brilliance shone in them. The quiet, demure Miss Livingston disappeared over come by the fervent need for deliverance. "Christy! That is the most unimaginative answer you could possibly give me!" Rachel's voice was edgy and sharp. "If you really claim to be my friend then you'll tell me exactly what I need to hear. Just say it Christy! Say it because I'm to afraid to."

Christy responded with equal passion, "Fine, have it your way." The strength in her own voice startled her; however, Rachel's outburst had propelled her to speak. "Rachel you're being selfish, purely and undeniably selfish. If what you are saying is true then you're not only ignoring Neil's heart, but you are ignoring God's guidance. Every moment you wait just makes you more cowardly and I know that's not who you want to be. You act as if you don't know the answer and yet you've practically told me that you've already made your decision. End it, Rachel!" She paused, "There are you happy?" The last sentence was said more quietly and more to herself. Christy hated being so brutal, but Rachel had asked for her honesty and as her friend she owed it to her to be clear. Never before had Christy spoken so boldly and the weight of her words was heavy on her heart. Yes, it was true, everything she said had been true, but that didn't stop the aching she felt. Christy Huddleston may not have been very fond of Neil MacNeill; however, she would never have wished him the heartbreak that was now coming because of her words.

Silence. Total silence and then a bright flash of lightening broke through the darkening sky. The thunder would crash at any moment and ruin the calm that surrounded them. Slowly Rachel turned her tear-streaked face towards Christy. A weak, "Thank you" was whispered and then she was gone. Watching her friend pull herself towards the mission house Christy lifted up a prayer. She prayed for Rachel, that she would have the strength to do what her heart was telling her was right. She prayed that God would bless her and bring a man into her life who would provide all the hope and excitement that she knew should come with being in love. Then she prayed for Neil MacNeill. This would be a crushing blow to man who obviously held deep feelings even if he seemed so cool and collected on the surface. Though there was no logic in her reasoning, Christy couldn't help but feel responsible for his coming pain. The rain drops fell harder upon the roof the little gazebo and Christy was glad the sky, for once, mirrored her emotions.


	10. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Crisp air gently bit at the nose of Alice Henderson as she rocked back and forth on the mission front porch. It was not quite seven in the morning and the peace that swept across the fields seemed to symbolize the still, peaceful rooms behind her. Recently Alice had noticed a mild uneasiness between two of the woman living at the mission and its presence had bothered her. She had tried very hard not to let her curiosity win out as she saw no obvious reason for the discord. Rachel and Christy had dived into their school lessons with a mutual respect and vigor that one rarely saw between strangers. In truth though, they had not been strangers since the moment they were introduced. There was something binding them to each other that Alice had not been able to put her finger on, but it brought her so much joy. The teachers had such unique personalities and outlooks on life, yet somehow their differences were able to compliment each other and produce a beautiful friendship. It was this bond that Alice had watch become strained and weakened over the early fall and it was unsettling. The quick rustling on the floorboards above her head were soon followed by the creaking of the wooden stairs that led to the dining room. The girls would be joining Miss Ida in the kitchen to help prepare breakfast, Alice thought. Instead of rising to join them as she would normally have done, she returned to her rocking with a little smile.

Something had changed that stormy afternoon last week and Alice Henderson thought she might have a slight idea what the cause had been. She remembered watching Rachel, soaking wet, enter the mission and go directly to bed for the rest of the day. She also remembered Christy sitting alone for longer then recommended in the cold, damp gazebo. At the time Alice had longed to run to both girls, holding them in her arms and comforting their pains. It was the mother in her that felt this yearning for peace between her two "daughters" however the Holy Spirit had very clearly stopped her steps and held her silently in place. As often happens with the Lord's timing, Alice was grateful that He had seen to keep her quiet and allow the women to mend their friendship on their own terms. It was not twenty four hours later when she had watched both of them arm in arm supporting the other as they walked to school the next morning. So it had been for the past week. Christy and Rachel verbally and non verbally striving to bare the burdens of the other with looks of peaceful joy in their eyes.

The screen to the mission house swung open with force as the two ladies in question burst through.

"Miss Alice, there you are!" Rachel spoke first.

"We were wondering what could have kept you from breakfast," Christy finished.

That mysterious grin that sometimes graced Miss Alice's face instantly showed itself as she observed the two treasures in front of her. Without a word she simply returned her gaze the open fields and held out her hand pointing in their direction.

"I suppose that's a good enough excuse" Christy quietly added as she took Rachel's hand and left their mentor to glory in the new morning.

Watching the two bob off into the schoolhouse had taken all her attention and she did not hear the hoof beats coming up beside the house until the rider announced himself.

"Morning Alice," she immediately lurched forward to see Neil MacNeill asride Charlie, "Forgive me, I had no intention of startling ya." They may have had their disagreements but Neil was always a welcome sight in Alice's eyes.

"Neil, I am very glad to see thy face this morning!" Her enthusiasm was real and he couldn't help but feel embarrassed at it. "We have not had the pleasure of thy company in over a week now, but I am glad to see thee has finally found time for us."

"Ah yes, I've had a busy few days. Several cases of, well several patients have required my, I've been busy," somehow he couldn't bring himself to lie to her. "I've only stopped by now to drop off of few supplies before I'm off again." His eyes were focused in the direction of the school and then they dropped to the reigns he still held in his hand. Alice recognized his discomfort immediately.

"Neil, thee seems troubled. Has thee eaten breakfast yet? I'd be happy to fix thee a plate and be a listening ear if thee so desire."

"Naw, its already getting late, but thank you just the same." The last thing Neil wanted was a listening ear from Alice Henderson. She was much to close to the situation and the whole point of the last few days was to completely separate himself from the reality of it all. Jumping down from his horse, Neil motioned inside, "Have the other's already eaten?" Immediately he regretted those words. Alice Henderson was no fool and he shouldn't underestimate her powers of observation.

"Miss Livingston and Miss Huddleston have already taken their breakfast, yes. In fact, thee just missed them. They have already left for school." She did not smile, she did not blink, she just sat there holding his gaze.

"Ah, I see" he mumbled something else under his breath about her answering more then he asked and then disappeared inside. Just as quickly he was back on the porch spouting unnecessary instructions about the supply closet and avoiding her direct eye contact.

Alice wouldn't let him off the hook so easily. "Doctor, you were missed at the service this last Sunday. Hopefully nothing will keep thee to busy for church this week." It was a sly comment, but she felt the need to gage his response.

"Aye Alice, I'll be there baring a medical emergency" he sighed, who was she, his mother?

"And thee is sure thee does not want to discuss anything? Anyone?" Now she was trying his patience.

"Alice, let me make this very clear." He tried to control his words and his temper, "I did not come by today for a counseling session! I only came because I knew you were in need of important medical supplies. I have no desire to discuss my private life with you or any one else at this mission so please mind your own business." Ouch, that last part had slipped and he regretted being so harsh.

"Very well, Dr. MacNeill" Alice's eye brows were raised, "then it is safe to assume thee did not plan thy visit today in order avoid a certain school teacher of ours?" His face told her everything she needed to know and although she appreciated having an answer she was sorry to find she had been right.

"Good day, Miss Henderson," was his only response before he spurred Charlie into a forced gallop. The fire she had seen his eyes was enough to burn through to her soul, but Alice knew she had brought it on herself.

* * *

"Rachel, I was wondering if I could run an idea by you?" The school day was over and Christy had been dying to bring up the subject for several days now. "While you were teaching our history lesson a little while back, it occurred to me that we should host a Thanksgiving meal here at the mission this year. What you do you think?" Christy had been terribly nervous about bringing up such a large suggestion. Hosting a meal for the entire cove would take a lot of work and require much more from the mission then the two women could handle on their own. Still, Christy had felt herself becoming such an integral part of the mission since she first arrived in August and she hoped they wouldn't see this idea as over stepping her boundaries.

"Oh Christy that is a fantastic idea!" Rachel beamed. "I am so glad you thought of it! What exactly did you have in mind."

"Well, I realize it would require a lot of energy, but I thought that we provided the mission house and we could ask each family to provide a dish for the meal in order to lessen the stress on Miss Ida," Christy began.

"Ha" Rachel laughed, "Yes, we'll definitely want to lessen the stress where she is concerned! But Thanksgiving in only a week away, do you think there is time?"

Christy continued, "I thought of that too. If David could make an announcement in church this Sunday then everyone would have plenty of time. Plus we could ask some of the men to bring their instruments and as a school project we could have the students stand up and talk about they are thankful for. It wouldn't have to be much, just a way to show their parents how much they have done. So do you think its to much?"

"I think its perfect! We'll have to discuss it with Miss Alice of course and get her permission, but other than that I think you're really on to something!"

Rachel's encouragement meant so much to Christy. It had taken a lot of courage for the new teacher to bring up the concept and Rachel's reaction was exactly what she had hoped for. The air had been so heavy lately and she had wanted to give Rachel a distraction. Nothing more had been said on the issue, but Christy could tell from Rachel's demeanor that she had followed through with Christy's advice. There had been one evening a few days back when Rachel had disappeared for a length of time and Christy had to come up with excuses for the rest of the group as to why she had missed dinner. Later that night Rachel had snuck into Christy's room to thank her for the diversion, but had given no explanation as to her whereabouts. At first Christy thought Rachel's silence was due to Ruby Mae sleeping in the bed across the room, but later she accepted it as an unspoken understanding between them. No words needed to be said, they both just knew.

Although Rachel had worked hard at not displaying her emotions; Christy couldn't help but be a little surprised at how much control her friend showed. She also couldn't help but imagine herself in the same situation and she had to admit the outcome would have been much more emotional. It was a trait that Christy's mother had said was a blessing and a curse. Christy always felt things very deeply and could not grasp the idea of only giving something or someone half of her heart. That characteristic was a driving force in her passion for life, but it also left Christy vulnerable to a more painful heartache then other's often felt.

"Yes," she had thought to herself, "a Thanksgiving meal is exactly what Rachel needs to lift her spirits." Then turning back to her friend she exclaimed, "Lets go find Miss Alice and start planning!"


	11. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Any original apprehension voiced by the mission residents over Christy's idea was quickly dispelled once the girls fully explained their plan. Christy's enthusiasm was tangible and her joy over the idea spread to each person involved. Miss Alice agreed that it was a wonderful way to show the people of Cutter Gap how much they had to be thankful for. Rachel thought it would a fun activity for the students. Miss Ida thought it would take up much to much time and energy, but then decided it was a good opportunity to try out some new recipes. And Ruby Mae couldn't stop talking about a chance to dance with Will Beck. Christy had approached David about making the announcement on Sunday and he very willingly agreed. There were very few things Christy asked that David was not willing to agree to these days. He was available and at her service more often then she actually wanted, but she kept reminding herself he probably treated everyone that way. After all, he was the preacher and he must just have a servant's heart. Whether it was youthful naiveté or forced ignorance Christy refused to see anything more than a Christian brotherly affection from the preacher and instead decided to focus on the following week of preparations. It would be there before she knew it and she had plenty of work to attend to. With new determination Christy was about to start making a to-do list when she noticed Rachel hurrying her way.

Slightly out of breath Rachel's voice was both strained and hushed. "Christy, you've got to help me! You'll think I'm so foolish, but I really need you right now."

"Of course! Anything, Rachel, just ask!" Christy's concern was evident, but she couldn't imagine what would be bothering her friend.

"Come over here, I don't want anyone hearing us." Motioning behind the mission porch, Rachel checked to make sure now one was near by. "Forgive me for being so secretive, but its about Neil." The last words were barely above a whisper. "Miss Ida just asked me to take some of her homemade jam over to his cabin and when David overheard he asked if I'd pass on some news about the party tomorrow. I just can't talk to him yet, Christy! Its to soon, I just can't go over there alone!"

Christy couldn't help but smile just a little at Rachel's desperate plea. Obviously this was very distressing, but it was the first time she had ever seen Rachel so ruffled. "Don't worry a thing about it, I'd be happy to come along with you. I'll protect you from the big, bad doctor" she added with a grin.

Letting out a small laugh Rachel looked up with a nervous, if not mischievous, glint in her eye, "Actually Christy," she paused for effect, "I was hoping you'd just go in my place. Please" she begged. "I know you're not very fond of Neil, but would you mind doing me this favor just this once? It would save me so much embarrassment!"

Christy started a little. Go over to Dr. MacNeill's alone? Sure she had been to his cabin before, but only with Miss Alice or Fairlight Spencer. This was for Rachel though and she might has well toughen up and get it over with. "Okay Rachel, it's the least I can do after all you've been through lately. I'll head over tomorrow after class." There at least she'd have some time to think about what she would say to him.

"Oh don't worry, I went ahead and packed up a basket for you to take right now. Its sitting on the porch. Thank you so much Christy!" Rachel's face was shining brightly again while Christy's eyes were wide with anxiety.

"Now? You want me to go now?" she sputtered.

"Well of course Christy, why ever not?" Rachel asked innocently.

Letting out a deep breath Christy tried to hide her nerves. "Better get this over with" she thought to her self as she went in search of that wretched basket.

* * *

Up ahead Christy could see the smoke from Dr. MacNeill's cabin rising above the tree line. "Just Great!" She huffed, "Of all days, he couldn't be out on a call?" She knew it was wrong of her to hope that someone was hurt, but was it so much to ask for just one emergency today. Laughing out loud, Christy realized how ridiculous her thoughts where. The very fact that she was on her way to Dr. MacNeill's cabin should have been enough to humor her especially considering she was now bringing him a goody basket and reminding him about the festivities tomorrow. In a few minutes she'd be standing before a man she'd barely given a friendly word to and she was supposed to act polite. She, who could easily be blamed for his current heartache, was supposed to make him feel wanted!

"Surely there has to be a little humor in all this, right Lord?" She smiled towards heaven and made her way up the front steps.

Neil MacNeill had definitely had better days. More accurately better weeks and months. Although he did not want to admit it, Rachel's desire to end their relationship was not as surprising as one might have thought. It hurt deeply and the sting was very real, but if he was honest with himself he'd have to say he saw it coming. Nothing about their relationship had mirrored what he saw for his future. Everything about Rachel was elegant and refined and nothing like the back wood's doctor. Her love for the children and love for his people had been just as attractive to him as her flawless complexion. However, he was a fool pursue a future with her. Neil had known rejection all his life. He was rejected by the major cities he studied in, he was rejected by his people when he returned to the cove, he was even rejected by his own wife until her death. Why should it surprise him that he was rejected once again. That was where the true pain stemmed, rejection. Once Neil had accepted Christ there was a fullness in his life that could only be described as belonging. He had assumed that feeling would grow as did his relationship with Rachel, but once he realized she still did not want to acknowledge their relationship publicly everything changed. Yes, he had a fullness in Christ but where Rachel was concerned he was completely at a loss. Looking back there were so many things that should have opened his eyes. It had made sense to hide their relationship at first, but after he found Christ Neil knew there was no good excuse. He had already married one woman who was ashamed of him, why did he feel the need to start that pain all over again. Still, he had selfishly held on to Rachel for as long as he could and now he had no choice but to let her go. Part of him was thankful to have have had his hand forced, but a small part of him was ashamed of himself for making her be the one to end things. He should have confessed his misgivings to her a long time ago and maybe their hearts would have been healed by now. Instead he had selfishly allowed his needs to come before what was best for Rachel and now he was paying the price. Neil had ignored God's leading for so long and now he realized this was just another example of his disobedience to God. Suddenly Neil felt the weight of his mistakes. By continuing his relationship with Rachel he had been missing out on all of the blessings that come along with following God's plan. It was very clear at that moment that Rachel had not been God's plan, but Neil's desire. With new momentum Dr. MacNeill realized that he should actually be very thankful to Rachel for finally allowing herself to listen to what the Holy Spirit had been telling them both for a long time. Two weeks ago when she had come by his cabin he was heartbroken. Now, incredibly, he felt the need to thank her. These revelations would not magically make the pain disappear, but Neil was now very aware of the fact that he still had a future to look forward to.

Grabbing his pole and tackle, Neil threw open his front door. Where better to start fresh than down by his faithful river? However, instead of barging onto the porch he stood rooted in place as he stared into Christy's surprised face. Her small fist still hung in the air from here she was about to knock. The fierce look in Neil's eyes combined with the butterflies in her already nervous stomach finally got the better of her. Without warning Christy broke into a heartfelt laugh as she stood before this towering mountain man. Neil was shocked to say the least. First, he had never truly seen Christy laugh before and second, he couldn't believe it was such a beautiful sight. Truly it was the most breathtaking scene he had ever witnessed. Her eyes shone, her sweet lips parted as the most melodious sound met his ears. Before he knew it, the great Dr. MacNeill could feel a blush creeping to his cheeks as he questioningly watched her try to regain some self-control.

"Glad to be a source of pleasure Miss Huddleston" his deep voice broke through her laughter.

"Oh yes Dr. MacNeill! Please forgive me, I don't know what has come over me" although obviously embarrassed Christy still couldn't stop laughing.

"Take no notice of it, I'm happy to oblige" now his own smile was at least at great as her own. "I wasn't expecting anyone today; however I'm very grateful for the company, tell me would you care to join me by the river?"

His eyes searched her own with a twinkle Christy had never noticed before. She couldn't believe this man was same Neil MacNeill who so arrogantly patronized her in the past. Yes she had seen him smile, but it was always with a condescending air as if he were an older brother laughing at her. This was honestly the first time Christy could say he wasn't laughing at her, but because of her and she had to admit she liked being the reason he was smiling.

Finally regaining her senses Christy thought to respond. "Actually Doctor, I come bearing Miss Ida's finest home made jam. If you let me place them inside I'd be happy to join you by the water." Pushing past the man in front of her Christy helped herself to the kitchen and started arranging each jar on the counter top. What on earth made her think to invite herself inside she had no idea. Apparently she was getting more and more comfortable with the mountain ways of familiarity. Neil waited for her in the doorway quizzically taking in her petite form as she moved through his kitchen. Once she neared him again he couldn't help but let out a small laugh, "Off we go then Miss Huddleston."

"Sitting by this river seems like it could do a person a world of good" Christy sighed.

"Be careful there Miss Huddleston, you're starting to sound like a mountain woman," Neil teased as he carefully worked his lure onto the line.

"And there is nothing wrong with that Dr. MacNeill!" Christy shot right back.

"Ay, I agree with you there lass" his rich brogue answered. "However, I'd hate to think what your parents would say if they heard you talking like that."

She wasn't sure if it was the unnerving sparkle in his eyes or the teasing tone in his voice, but Christy couldn't bring herself to be irritated at him; at least not this time.

"For your information, Dr. MacNeill" she said in her most haughty southern drawl, "my mother would be mortified at the lack of propriety shown by her daughter sitting on log in the middle of the woods. But…" she changed her tone, "my father would be right proud o' his youngin'"

Neil let out a deep roar at this last statement. "You, Miss Huddleston, are not to be underestimated! Who knew Rachel's little shadow had such a sense of humor." As soon as the words left his lips, he knew he had gone to far and this time Christy took full offense.

Her eyes shone with unmitigated anger as she turned on him, "Rachel's little shadow? Is that what you think of me?" Her voice lost all its sweetness. "How dare you Doctor! I'm working very hard to make my own place here in Cutter Gap and I do not appreciate your…"

"Whoa there Christy!" He threw up his hands, "Hold on now, lass!" It was the first time she'd heard him call her by her Christian name and only the second time he'd called her lass. Even in her fury she couldn't help but notice her stomach flutter at the sound of her name on his lips. "I didn't mean you any harm. You're doing a wonderful job here in the cove and I shouldn't have said what I did. You and Rachel are both working miracles with the school and we're all lucky to have you."

Even though his words soothed her hurt pride, she wasn't quite through with him. "And we both have a lot to offer in our own way, right Doctor?" She was leading him and he knew it.

"Ay, Christy, in your own way." He grinned knowing he'd been forgiven.

"Not that I wouldn't mind being exactly like Miss Livingston. She is everything a proper woman should be." Christy's chin was raised in the air both in as a sign of pride and respect in her friend.

"Ay Christy, once again you're correct. But for the record I've seen plenty things about you're character this afternoon that, while I wouldn't call proper, are very attractive in a woman." _Did I just say that outloud_, Neil smirked?

_Did he just say that outloud_, Christy blushed?

"Well now Doctor I'm not sure if I should be terribly offended or complimented by that statement." Christy tried to look stern, but before she lost control of the situation she quickly changed the subject. "But it really doesn't matter what you think about me now does it? My purpose in coming here today was to drop of the jam and remind you of tomorrow's party. I think I've accomplished my goal and now I should be heading back to the mission." All of this was said with as much maturity and sophistication as she could muster.

"Be sure to thank Miss Ida for me and you can be sure that I'll be there tomorrow." With a slight dip of his head Neil turned his attention back to the water.

Waiting until she was almost out of sight Neil turned back towards Christy's path calling out, "Oh and Miss Huddleston, I look forward to asking you to dance tomorrow night." He paused seeing her stop and turn back towards him, "As long as you lose the attitude that is!" He couldn't help the loud laugh that echoed through the trees as he saw her eyes glare, her form straighten and then turn and march decidedly into the woods.


End file.
